A Public Apology to My Wife
Most husband and wife stuff is private, but I disappointed my wife in a very public way and the only way to really apologize is to make it public.
One night last year, I think it was a Saturday, a tweet went out on Cali Lewis’ account about global warming being a hoax. It became a big controversy that ended with Leo Laporte saying he no longer wanted to work with her. People are split on the issue of anthropomorphic climate change so thousands of people rallied around her and thousands slammed her.
There is a major problem, though. She didn’t write that tweet and she didn’t hit the update button. I did.
Since we started GeekBrief.TV, I’ve studied media successes to learn techniques for growing an audience and keeping them interested. Publicly writing something controversial is usually a very good thing to do. You don’t loose as many people as seems logical because people want to stick around to see what you’ll do or say next.
When Cali found out what I did, it obviously it made her angry. To her, politics is private and divisive. She doesn’t enjoy it in the least.
I apologized, but also argued my case about the benefits of the controversy. We had recently had dinner with John C. Dvorak and he explained how he has used controversy in his long career as a tech writer to keep people paying attention. I thought Cali bought-in to the idea of creating controversy, but I was wrong.
She was deeply hurt by what I did. She is the kindest person in the world and she didn’t want to embarrass me. She’s lived with letting everyone believe it came from her because of our relationship. The only way I can make it right is to publicly apologize. A private apology is utterly insufficient because what I did pushed her into a public, political battle she didn’t want to fight. She lost friends and business opportunities because of what I did. I hope this blog post will mend some of those relationships.
I also want to apologize to friends of GeekBrief.TV and followers of Cali’s tweets. The controversy experiment just wasn’t worth it, especially without her participation. I’m sorry.
20 Responses to “A Public Apology to My Wife”
Leave a Reply
You know I love both of you – and apologized to Cali via email way back then.
I agree politics is divisive, but those who don’t get involved consent to be ruled by the people who do. So I hope you’ll both continue to share your passions both politically and otherwise.
As a husband myself I’d just suggest you do it on your own account.
All the best,
Leo
Glad you were able to patch things up and come clean with this issue.
You both have such considerable influence on a myriad of levels in both personal and professional circles in the tech field, that taking a stand on just about anything outside it can be a crap shoot at best. Opinions are one thing; beliefs are another. Never the twain shall meet; lest one be sent to the sofa at night.
You think global warming is a hoax, just wait until you find out about grasshopper pie — NO GRASSHOPPER WHATSOEVER!!!
Thanks for the candor, and kudos to you for “person-ing up!”
If people stopped watching one of the best (if not the best) tech podcasts out there because of a political statement, then they were watching the wrong podcast to begin with.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, and in my opinion you really should tweet those ideas as yourself.
You are a big man. I normally don’t see eye-to-eye with your views at times, but this post gives me more respect of you. I trust that Cali will, if not already, will forgive you.
Neal,
I do like your political blogs – keep it up. But shame on you for using your wife’s e-mail. No wonder you had to apologize.
Though I agree with your sentiments concerning the global warming hoax – in the future just post them under your own moniker.
Public apology was necessary in this instance for the reasons stated above. I sure accept your sincere desire to mend fences and face the consequences. Thought it was neat Leo was the 1st to reply. You guys are just awesome. And we’re all growing up with this new media. Too easy to hit the enter button w/o discussing it.. especially when it was someone else’s button. Cali shows’ a great deal of respect towards you by taking the blame.
Good for you Neal. Now… lets get back to some awesome GBTV!!!
PS Love you both dearly
I really enjoy listening to Leo, and I don’t agree with his politics. Heck, I don’t agree with most of my brother’s and cousins’ either. But I still love them all. You don’t HAVE to agree on all counts. We’re individual people, not zombies. Neal, you’re great. Cali’s great. Your public apology was very well done. I hope it helped.
I happen to subscribe to your political views, Neil. And while I don’t agree with you hijacking Cali’s twitter account, I’m more disappointed with Leo, a guy whom I had respected very much. People should be free to subscribe to whatever political views they espouse and pronouncements like Leo’s are an arrogant means of suppressing political dissent. I’ll still listen to you, Leo, but get over yourself.
This seems like to little to late. But on the other hand, who cares. Both you and Cali do great things on Geekbrief, and have built an excellent reputation in this area, but you need to understand your sphere of influence. People pay attention because of your knowledge and expertise in the realm of gadgets and all things “Geek”, not for your political views. Your show is not called Politicsbrief. Your politics may be a passion for you, but you are projecting your “geek” credibility into that world, and it doesn’t exist. You expect people to respect your political viewpoints at the same level as your “geek” views, but that won’t happen. Of course, I was not at your meeting with John, but I am sure the controversial moments he was discussing were with topics that he had creditability, not something completely out of left field. Stick with Geekbrief publicly, talk passionately about politics with your friends. The other option would be to dump Geekbrief, and start a politics podcast. Please don’t do that………
I seem to remember seeing that tweet and being surprised as it was very uncharacteristic for her tweets. I tend to avoid tweeting on politics as well, probably for similar reasons – a lot of my views are markedly different than much of the “crowd” I hang with.
Good to see your apology and good to see that it looks like things with Leo Laporte were resolved. I hope Cali tweets your article
I agree with others who have said don’t tweet on others accounts – especially if it is isn’t what they would tweet.
Good for you, Neal, for posting this.
I have to say, that tweet had also surprised me when it came out — it seemed completely out of character for Cali.
I hope this brings some closure for both of you to what I imagine to have been a painful episode.
http://ageofpersuasionpodcast.blogspot.com/
Like the man said, who ever said there’s no such thing as bad publicity never talked to Exxon
You’re a good man, Neal. You and Cali are both great people and I enjoy GeekBrief immensely!
The one thing about burned bridges is they can always be rebuilt.
I have a lot of respect for you posting this.
The way that GeekBrief has changed over the years (I just re-watched the first episode) shows how much you guys keep learning, and how much better it is to be yourself.
Publicity stunts can be fun, but whenever controversy is used for that purpose, it’s just cheap; something you guys have frequently proved you aren’t.
Best wishes
Rob
Very well said. I’m proud of you for stepping up on this. Most guys would have just swept it under the rug, but you’re cleaning it up.
It gets hard for a guy to admit his mistakes. The good part is that it’s still early on in y’all’s professional career and in time, all of this will be forgotten.
Thanks for clearing the air on this. Your a good man Charlie Brown.
Love ya!
-d
Sorry neal,but what you did to us, and especially to your wife is just inexcusable. To start a controversy just for publicity? You have no credibility left to us at all. As for Cali, I feel that your actions using her name, well I wouldn’t be inclined to accept your excuse so readily. I’m done here. Just so disappointed!!!
signed: Coutch
Eastsidefilms
Detroit
Everyone makes mistakes, what seperates mice from men is taking ownership of them. If your wife forgives you, learn from this mistake, and then forgive yourself.
Love the podcast, keep it up.
Ah, but Leo still believes he’s in the party of compassion and diversity.